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Feb. 3rd, 2005 10:13 amDropped off Pan at Angell at 7:30 this morning. Now I wait. Thanks for all the well-wishes and sympathy of yesterday. We all appreciate it.
My sweater is covered in his hair.
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Last nght I met with Seyyide to do a crash course on zar. It was incredibly productive and my zar is going to be kickass, if I do say so myself. I really enjoyed the movements a lot. My neck isn't at all sore today. In fact, the head rolls and hair tossing may have done some good for the tension in my shoulders. Plus I was riding a huge endorphin high afterwards*. It's important for performance purposes not to let yourself actually go into trance, but I'm tempted to just let go and go all out at home. I understand why the zar ritual is a means of catharsis.
*It was very strange to be going home on the T with my thinking brain full of sad thoughts but my chemical body full of racing bouncing off the wall thoughts. But again, I suppose that's almost the point of the ritual.
We also had some good talking about the class schedule. Class on Tuesday was a little strange, because all of a sudden the class was full of people who I didn't really know. Most of the time I've been in the class, it's been smallish with a strong core group, but I seem to be the only remnant of that group. It was very disorienting. People are at different levels and stages of training as well, which made things a little more disjointed than previously. What I think I'm going to do is in addition to the regular class, I'm going to do regular private lessons with Seyyide so that I can continue to get personalized instruction and more advanced lessons. Now that the regular class is shorter, it costs less so that will help cover the cost of private lessons, plus she gives a bulk discount if you pay in advance for four private lessons. I feel much better about the class situation now.
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Well, that was momentarily diverting. Now I wait some more.
My sweater is covered in his hair.
---
Last nght I met with Seyyide to do a crash course on zar. It was incredibly productive and my zar is going to be kickass, if I do say so myself. I really enjoyed the movements a lot. My neck isn't at all sore today. In fact, the head rolls and hair tossing may have done some good for the tension in my shoulders. Plus I was riding a huge endorphin high afterwards*. It's important for performance purposes not to let yourself actually go into trance, but I'm tempted to just let go and go all out at home. I understand why the zar ritual is a means of catharsis.
*It was very strange to be going home on the T with my thinking brain full of sad thoughts but my chemical body full of racing bouncing off the wall thoughts. But again, I suppose that's almost the point of the ritual.
We also had some good talking about the class schedule. Class on Tuesday was a little strange, because all of a sudden the class was full of people who I didn't really know. Most of the time I've been in the class, it's been smallish with a strong core group, but I seem to be the only remnant of that group. It was very disorienting. People are at different levels and stages of training as well, which made things a little more disjointed than previously. What I think I'm going to do is in addition to the regular class, I'm going to do regular private lessons with Seyyide so that I can continue to get personalized instruction and more advanced lessons. Now that the regular class is shorter, it costs less so that will help cover the cost of private lessons, plus she gives a bulk discount if you pay in advance for four private lessons. I feel much better about the class situation now.
---
Well, that was momentarily diverting. Now I wait some more.
